Bedroom Hymns
by AMiserableLove
Summary: Henry is still lost, Neverland is as dark and dangerous as ever and Emma's not sure she can take the unyielding pressure that's building up inside of her, threatening to pull her under, drown her and suffocate her. She needs release, she's desperate for relief, and there's only one person on board the Jolly Roger who can meet her needs. *M-rated stuff ahead*


**Emotional smut anyone?!**

**Disclaimer: I don't own OUAT.**

**Please review! :) THANKS!**

* * *

Emma wasn't sure what she was doing anymore.

Sailing through the calm and quiet Never Sea, they were headed to Skull Rock, following a tip given to them by a helpful sprite—the news that the Lost Ones were hiding out there the best that they had heard in a long while. After days of fighting with Regina, keeping an eye on Gold, avoiding her parents worried and curious stares, and staying clear of Hook's intense and searching looks, she was utterly exhausted. And it wasn't only the inhabitants of the Jolly Roger who were wearing on her.

_Neverland _was taking its toll on her—eluding the cunning mermaids, dodging the angry pixies' wrath, and fighting off the hungry beasts that lurked in the shadows was more than a little tiring. She needed sleep. It was something she absolutely craved, her body was exhausted and weary.

So she wasn't exactly sure what she was doing.

Only that she needed something.

Something only _he _could give her.

And taking in a deep breath she closed her eyes for a moment before lifting her hand...

He answered after only one knock; it was almost as if he'd been waiting for her the entire time, her knuckles just barely rapping on the smooth wood before the door opened slowly.

"Swan."

Swallowing over the sudden tightness in her throat, Emma nodded, chewed on her lower lip, and fiddled with her hands; grasping her fingers together and twisting them tight, before shoving them in her pockets somewhat angrily, annoyed with herself for fidgeting in front of him.

"Um…I—I was just wondering how far out we are from Skull Rock, because, well, I was just um…" she trailed off, unsure how to finish the sentence, her face heating as he leaned against the door lazily, his blue eyes silently appraising her as she struggled for words. "I was—"

"A day and a half." Hook answered quietly, interrupting her stuttering, as embarrassed, she looked away from him to stare at the floor between them.

"Right." Emma nodded again, her hands still jammed in her pockets, and rocking back on her heels, she cleared her throat, turning to leave. "Okay well…thanks I was just wondering because I was curious and so…so thanks..." Shaking her head, she winced—her entire body hot with a blush.

She was so off-balance, unnerved.

And she felt like an idiot.

"Emma," he practically purred her name, his lilting voice speaking it softly; a hint of humor laced within his tone, it hung in the air, causing her to pause, forcing her gaze to meet his once again. "I'm quite sure you didn't come to my cabin in the dead of night simply to ask me a question you already knew the answer to." Stepping towards her, his movements slow and deliberate, his eyes hot on hers, he smirked knowingly. "So why don't you come in and we'll discuss why you're really here."

She opened her mouth to question his words, shoot back some smart retort, because really, why else would she have come to his room? She was worried about her son, she needed to know how far out they were, it was as simple as that. She had absolutely no other reasons for coming to his cabin in the middle of the night—and stubbornly she ignored the voice in her head that whispered _liar._

"I-I just want to see my son, I needed to know how much longer..."

_Lie.  
_

For as worried as she felt, for as exhausted as she was, for as badly as she needed sleep, she was also tightly wound—brimming with nervous energy. She was in desperate need of some kind of relief and her body had brought her to him before her mind had gotten the chance to fully catch up.

It was a terrifying notion.

"Oh...I should go." She whispered, the realization of what she truly sought from him sinking in, as her heart slowed a moment before pounding frantically against her chest.

Hook didn't say anything at that, instead he merely raised an eyebrow, and giving her another infuriating smirk and a slight nod, he backed away from the door, opening it wider while coolly watching her, indicating with his hook for her to step into the room, urging her to do the exact opposite of what she had just stated.

For a moment she hesitated.

For a moment she took note of the voices in her head that were trying to rationally argue against her desire to seek solace in his room.

No good would come of it.

He would expect something from her; she could see it in his striking blue gaze, the way his eyes roamed over her freely and without apology. He _wanted_ something from her and if she walked through that door…he'd take it.

_And she wanted him to._

Taking a deep breath Emma moved forward and stepping past him, walked into the cabin, stiffening fractionally when he closed the door behind her, the feel of his body so close to hers as he followed her into his quarters before brushing by her bringing a wave of goosebumps to her arms

"Drink?" His tone was casual, low and somewhat pleasant.

Her eyes sweeping over the small and neatly kept room, she considered the offer for a moment before quickly shaking her head _no_, her body nearly humming as it anticipated something she had yet to fully comprehend. Bringing her gaze over to him as he stepped towards his desk and picked up a small glass tumbler, she watched as he filled it with a clear liquid.

What the hell was she doing?

What the hell was she_ going_ to do?

"Why are you here darling?" Propping himself against his desk, he leaned back; and bringing his drink to his lips, he took a small sip, his eyes never leaving hers as she met his stare.

Why was she here?

It was a loaded question.

_A dangerous one. _

"I'm not sure." she whispered, answering him truthfully. And unable to take the scrutiny of his gaze any longer she glanced away, feeling like a coward as she did.

Sure she knew what her body desired from him, she could feel the pull between them, had always been able to feel it—their time together in Neverland only intensifying the current of underlying wants and needs that flowed between them. But was she ready to admit to it, was she willing to ask for it? Was it wrong for her to crave it while her son was still lost and waiting to be rescued?

"Oh I think you do sweetheart."

Her gaze snapping back to his with the statement, her eyes widened when she saw that he had placed his drink down and was moving towards her, his steps full of obvious purpose, his gaze dark and challenging.

"I don't." she insisted, backing up a step or two as he continued to make his way to her.

His smile was quick, calculated, and dangerous—calling her out on her lie. "Emma, Emma, Emma," he sang her name, the way his lilting voice wrapped around it nearly causing her to shudder, a frown catching her lips as her legs hit the back of his bed. "I think you know what you want, you wouldn't be here if you didn't."

"I wanted to know how far out we are…I just can't sleep…" she attempted, swallowing thickly as she ran a hand through her hair, part of her wishing that he'd stop coming towards her while another part just wanted him to hurry up and close the damned space between them already.

"You're tired," he spoke quietly, taking another step forward, her chin tilting up to meet his stare. "You're anxious," he closed the gap slowly, his body brushing against hers as he lowered his head and peered down at her somewhat curiously. "You're tense." Leaning towards her, she saw a flash of white teeth before he shifted and placed his lips next to her ear, the feel of his hot breath against her skin causing her knees to go weak as her blood ran hot. "And you need me to help to relieve you of some of that tension isn't that right?" With the question he nipped lightly at her ear lobe, a deep chuckle escaping him as she let out a startled gasp. Straightening, his eyes finding hers once more, she watched as desire clouded his gaze, his body nearly vibrating with want as he stared down at her heavily. "I'll give you one chance and one chance only to leave _princess._ Take it now, otherwise…tonight you're mine."

"That's not…" she started and seeing a brief flash of anger spark in his eyes, she considered her words, wondering if it was worth it to lie to him. He would know…he always knew.

Maybe she'd give him_ tonight._

Just one night.

Only one night.

"Okay." She whispered the agreement softly; her voice trembling slightly as she averted her gaze from his, something tightening in her gut even as the heaviness that had been weighing inside of her lifted fractionally. And inhaling deep, calming her thoughts, and steadying her breathing, she met his eyes once again. "Okay."

_Lust._

_Hot, blinding, undeniable lust._

She thought he'd give her a chance to breathe, her body shaking as the realization of what she had agreed to swept through her fast. But instead of wasting time on pleasantries and conversation, he grinned wide and devastating and swooping his hooked arm around her waist, crushed her body to his; sparks lighting her skin as she immediately went into fight mode, her hands pushing at him halfheartedly as he merely continued to hold her to him firmly.

"Was that so hard sweetheart?"

He didn't give her a chance to answer. It wasn't one of those kind of questions anyway. And tilting her head to the side she watched as he bent his head slightly before capturing her in a kiss that was as fierce and branding as it was gentle and soothing.

_Finally, good God, finally. _

It was all she could think, all she could feel as his lips moved against hers hungrily, drinking in the breathy sigh that escaped her as his tongue pushed its way into her mouth, tasting her, devouring her, claiming her. Without thought, she pushed her body against his, lifting her hands she ran them over his shoulders, through his hair, to clasp tightly around his neck, her hips tilting into his almost desperately as she eagerly sought what her body had been looking for all along.

_Relief._

_Redemption._

_Him._

Nipping her lips lightly he pulled back on a groan, his eyes dark and stormy and filled with such raw need that she felt her stomach drop and her heart clench as her pulse began to race rapidly.

"Undress yourself and get on the bed darling."

At his request she paused; her body tensing and her eyes narrowing, she tilted her head back with a slightly incredulous look pinching at her features. "Excuse me?"

"One night soon I'll take my time unwrapping you slowly, but tonight is not that night."

She opened her mouth to correct him, intent on letting him know that this was a first time and last time type deal. But something stopped her, whether it was the pit in her stomach at the thought or the knowing look in his eyes that dared her to state otherwise she was unsure—but she remained silent nevertheless, watching as he stepped back from her to undress himself. Without hesitation his good hand moved to his shirt and swiftly began to undo the buttons there, and feeling an infuriating blush heat her cheeks, she turned from him. Looking down at the tidy bed, she took in a deep breath, and exhaled slowly before grabbing the hem of her shirt and pulling it over her head fast.

When the cool air of the cabin hit her skin, she shivered before quickly going to work on her bra, attempting not to let her racing thoughts get the best of her as she heard him shifting and moving behind her. Bending down, her hair falling over her shoulders in a tangled blonde curtain, she yanked off her boots, dropping them to the floor beside her before unzipping her pants and wiggling out of them hurriedly. Her hands slightly shaky, her legs somewhat weak, she stood naked save for her underwear, and closed her eyes, swallowing over the lump in her throat and attempting to ignore the slight roaring in her ears.

_She was nervous. _

"Gods Emma."

His voice startled her and Emma flinched a bit at the sound, her head lifting fractionally as she continued to stare down at his neatly made bed, unwilling to turn to him just yet. And as he came up behind her, his good hand grasping her upper arm gently while his hook brushed her hair back behind her shoulder, she let out a shaky breath, inadvertently leaning into him as he placed a tender yet burning kiss on her suddenly hot skin. His hand rubbing up and down her arm slowly, he kissed her again, this time biting into her shoulder lightly, the action causing her to jump, as a soft gasp escaped her lips. Something inside of her pulling her to him, she turned her head back towards him, meeting his eyes—the dark desire and unyielding intensity she saw nearly causing her to back out then and there.

_Too much…it was too much._

"Get on the bed lass." he murmured, holding her stare unblinkingly.

Run.

Flee.

Escape.

_Stay._

With the too many voices continuing to swarm around in her head, Emma glanced away and considered them a moment, wishing everything would just shut-up and go silent. _She wanted this._ Looking back up at him, she nodded, her lips threatening to break into a self-deprecating smirk as she stepped away from him and lowered herself onto his bed. Crawling into the center of it she turned onto her back, propping herself up on her elbows as she settled herself on the mattress. Slowly, almost comically she felt her eyes widen as they roamed over his taut and well-muscled body, finally taking in the sight of him completely nude.

"Like what you see?"

She raised an eyebrow, feeling her spine stiffen angrily at his taunting tone; but unsure if she could speak—her mouth had gone dry and her lips were somewhat numb—she merely shot him an unamused glare, every nerve in her body tingling as he grinned at her silence and slowly made his way onto the bed. As the mattress dipped down with his weight, she licked her lips nervously, mentally chastising herself for feeling so anxious. She had been with plenty of men before, she was experienced, talented even; this shouldn't be such a big deal.

_But it was._

"Relax sweetheart, I believe we've both done this before."

Flashing her eyes to his, she let out a breathy and forced laugh; slightly curious if he was aware of how fast her heart was beating against her chest. "I'm fine," she murmured softly, even as she tensed as the length of his body, covered hers—skin brushing against skin, smooth and soft against hard and scarred.

"Are you?" he whispered the question, the words dusting across her lips as he leaned against her, the feel of his throbbing arousal brushing her thigh bringing a fluttering sensation to her already knotted stomach.

"Yes." She whispered the assurance back, her eyes drifting to his lips momentarily before drawing back up to his.

"Good."

Without another word he kissed her slowly, lazily, his tongue darting out to taste her lips before gently demanding she open her mouth for him, his leg shifting ever so slightly so that his knee was resting against her already wet core. Pressing into her heavily, he pushed her down with his body, her hands coming up to wrap around his neck as she allowed him to lay her all the way down on the bed, a dull pressure beginning to build up inside of her slowly, becoming even more intense when he rocked his hips against hers lightly.

"Emma," he said her name once, breaking the kiss, "I've decided I'm going to take my time with you."

Saying nothing else he began to move his way down her body—lips, teeth, and tongue brushing, nipping and sucking as he dragged them slowly across her throat, down her chest, placing a quick kiss on each breast, before moving to her stomach. And as he worked his way down, his destination obvious, Emma brought the back of her hand to her mouth, dragging her teeth across a finger lightly when he stopped at the rim of her underwear; his eyes hooded and dark looked up at her quickly before with a hint of a grin, he pulled the lingerie down expertly, tossing it to the floor without hesitation. When she was bared, completely exposed before his eyes, she watched as he openly stared, his eyes taking in every naked inch of her.

"Beautiful." He whispered in an awe-filled voice, and settling himself between her spread legs, he lowered his head to her once again.

When his lips touched her inner thigh she sucked in a sharp breath, her body aching for him to move closer to where she wanted,_ needed_, him most. His stubble scraping her sensitive skin, he brushed his lips upwards, moving slowly, grazing his teeth lightly against her as he worked his way to her center. Her face flushing hot, her body humming with need, her fingers twitched—she wasn't sure if she wanted to grab his head and pull him away from her, or fist her hands into his hair and urge him closer.

_More_, a voice in her head whispered softly, even as another one spoke of _danger._

Her eyes closed tight, she didn't see so much as feel when his lips met her already wet folds. Placing a feather light kiss to her, she felt him smile against her oversensitive skin as she jumped at the intimate caress, her eyes flashing open fast.

"Sweetheart," his hot breath washed over her as his good hand came up; his fingers parting her gently, he shifted on the bed—his gaze intent and focused on its goal. "I want to hear you."

"Hook, please—" she whispered, her words getting caught in her throat as he licked at her lightly, his eyes still gazing up at her, watching her carefully. "Oh God." She moaned it quietly, her entire body going hot and rigid as his tongue swept across her again, a finger rubbing over her clit gently; he continued his sinful ministrations with his talented mouth—his tongue alternating from licking her fast and lapping her slowly.

It felt good.

_Too good._

She writhed beneath him, unable to stop from thrusting her hips up towards him as his tongue delved deep inside of her—her moan mixing with his satisfied groan clashed in the quiet room deafeningly.

"You taste so sweet Emma." He spoke low, his nose brushing her lightly as he inhaled her heady scent, the action bringing a blush to her cheeks. "I'm going to make you come like this, bared before me, hot and needy and _wanton_."

Yes.

No.

_More._

Before she could answer him, argue him, deny him, he shifted his weight again, using his elbows to spread her thighs apart even wider as his forearms held her firmly in place. His tongue working her thoroughly, he licked at her clit, playing with it in quick and fast strokes before dipping inside of her, stroking her deeply and tasting her fully. It drove her crazy, her soft cries echoed in the cabin as pressure continued to build inside of her rapidly, coiling tight in her belly. It wasn't until she heard him chuckle low against her that she realized that she had fisted her hands into his hair—her fingers yanking on the strands she had grabbed onto as her hips struggled against his hold, the urge to move against him nearly unbearable.

"You're amazing, brilliant." He said with a quick sweep of his tongue, lifting his head. "I've thought about this for a long while now, having you laid on your back beneath me." His eyes finding hers, flashed intense and bright. "I want you to come for me, I want to feel you." And plunging a finger deep inside of her, she heard him breathe in sharply as he sucked on her sensitive nub, the feel of his finger going in and out of her as his mouth moved over her nearly too much to take.

"Ohhhh, oh god, oh god, oh please…" she mumbled incoherent words softly in a broken voice; her heart beat rapidly as her toes began to curl—pleasure rising inside of her fast, she chased it frantically needing release, craving it badly.

"Let yourself go Emma." And with the soft demand, he pushed another finger inside of her, curling it ever so slightly, causing the pressure to bend and break as she shattered abruptly beneath him.

Reaching her peak, she fell over the edge, waves of ecstasy washing over her as she rode out her orgasm, her fingers twisting in his hair, her hips struggling against his arms, quiet moans fell from her lips breathily, the sounds only urging him on. She wasn't sure she could survive such pressure, such intense pleasure; her entire body was sparking with heat, vibrating and trembling near violently, lights flashed behind her closed eyelids, the sounds around her became dimmed and muted until they eventually faded completely.

_Bliss, such agonizing, terrifying bliss._

She wasn't sure how long it was before she gained awareness once again. Slowly she came back to herself, noticing how her thighs were cradling him weakly, her heart still pounding hard against her chest as her body hummed and buzzed in the aftermath of her orgasm. Swallowing, her throat tight and dry, she licked her lips carefully, tasting blood as she ran her tongue across them, realizing with some surprise that she must have bit down on them as he had driven her to the point of near madness.

Feeling him stir, her eyes shot down, and she watched, her heart jumping to her throat, as he moved up her body—a satisfied grin on his face, his hair mussed up from her fingers. Settling himself over her, so that his lips were a mere breadth away from hers, his eyes sought hers imploringly, looking for answers to questions he had not yet spoken. Letting out a shaky breath, unsure what to do, what to say, she worried her lower lip as a deeper need took hold of her fast, tensing when he adjusted himself over her—his tip teasing her entrance tauntingly.

"I'm going to take you now Emma…I'm going to ravish you until you're weak and trembling and out of your mind with need." He leaned closer, his head lowering, he brushed his lips over hers, lingering briefly; she could taste herself on him. "I want you to give me everything, I won't stop until you do.

She wasn't sure if it was supposed to be a threat, if his smoothly spoken words were supposed to scare her or turn her on. But a combination of both reactions coursed through her as he drew his hips back before placing his hook near her head, and his good hand near his arousal. A dark smile lighting his features, he guided himself into her slowly.

"Ohhhh God." She moaned softly, without thought; her hips rising to meet his, and her hands coming up to grasp his shoulders as he slid all the way inside of her, seating himself deep, so that he could go no further. Her breath hitching in her throat, she shuddered as her walls clenched around him; and gripping him tightly, she urged him to move when he remained still—his breathing heavy and his eyes screwed shut tight, pure rapture shadowing his features.

"Hook." Emma whispered his name, her fingers digging into his skin, she arched herself off the bed, "please…oh God please move."

He opened his eyes at the sound of her voice, his gaze finding hers; his lips twitched faintly as an odd look crept into his stare. "_That_, darling, is not my name." And saying nothing else, he drew himself out of her completely, pulling a moan of protest from her, before slamming back inside of her fully.

He set the pace then; slow and steady, he drove into her over and over again, her fingers clawing up and down his back, tracing over the scars that lingered there as he continued to thrust into her deeply. Whimpering softly, she hooked her legs around his waist, digging her heels into his ass, as she felt the pressure begin to grow once more, her entire body feeling as if it were on fire as he slammed into her again and again—the mattress squeaking and creaking as it protested their weight. And greedily, she welcomed the hot near painful intrusion even as the world around her tilted and spun. Her head going dizzy, the many voices in her brain continued to question her actions, roaring louder as she drew closer to climax once more.

"Emma." His voice barked at her, his tone strained and gruff as he stilled himself inside of her. "Don't look away from me."

Shooting her gaze back to his, unaware that it had drifted in the first place, she met his storm-filled eyes. And as they held each other's stares—turbulent blue and hazy green—slowly, deliberately he began to move once again. With her eyes locked on his—his body rippling over hers, the feel of him sliding in and out of her and hitting her in just the right spot—she began to tremble, the intensity and passion of what was occurring between them quickly becoming too much. Their noses almost touching, their lips almost brushing, he refused to allow her to look away, thrusting into her slow and deep as his eyes remained fierce on hers.

_Too much, it was way too much._

Suddenly her throat felt too narrow, her breathing became labored as images—Hook offering her the bean, his ship, his services, their many adventures in Neverland, and his knowing looks and almost touches—flashed before her eyes fast, stealing her breath and muddling her thoughts.

He had come back for her.

He was trying to save her son.

_He was saving her._

It wasn't what she had wanted; it wasn't what she had come to him for.

The raw intensity nearly suffocating her as her emotions began to spiral out fast, her body suddenly became unbearably hot as her eyes stung with unshed tears. She was losing control. She was going to break.

"Emma," His voice sounded far away as he demanded her attention once more, and dimly she realized with slight wonder that he had stopped moving again; his length buried entirely inside of her, he hovered over her, staring down at her intently.

"I—I…" she trailed off, shaking her head quickly as she tried to get a grip on what was happening to her; her eyes darting away from his, she turned her head to the side. "Just keep moving please." she whispered softly, shame and humiliation warring inside of her when a tear slowly trailed down her cheek, marking its path with a wet and branding trail.

"Look at me."

Closing her eyes, she concentrated on breathing, pushing away the voices that were questioning her desires, her reactions, her emotions.

She couldn't think about it.

She couldn't _afford_ to think about it.

"Please just…please." She didn't know what she needed from him, only that she didn't want him to stop, but she couldn't bear to face him any longer.

Silence hung between them and when he shifted slightly she had to bite back a moan as waves of pleasure drifted over her, even as more tears threatened to escape her eyes. Her gaze drifting over his dimly lit cabin, she bit back a muffled sob, annoyed and distressed that he continued to stay still, refusing to move—his stillness only allowing the voices in her head, the emotions she was trying to ignore, to grow louder, become more obvious.

_Longing._

_Desire._

_Need._

Finally, almost abruptly, she felt some of the tension drain from his body as a soft sigh escaped his lips. "Very well darling." he whispered, and turning her head and lifting her eyes to his, she watched as understanding crossed his features.

For a moment she was afraid he was going to stop completely—tell her to get dressed and leave. Part of her actually hoped he would while another part protested the offensive thought. The intimacy between them was overwhelming but it was something she wasn't sure she wanted to end just yet. She still believed she needed this_ one_ night. She needed to see it through; even if she wasn't sure she had the strength to look him in the eyes as he hovered over her and stripped her bare.

And as she considered her predicament, she felt him withdraw from her suddenly, her body arching upwards unconsciously, trying to pull him back to her even as slight relief swam in her head. But before she could breathe easier, before she could let the embarrassment sink in, he was moving fast, flipping her over so that she lay on her stomach.

"On your hands and knees Swan."

Swallowing, unsure what his intentions were, her body reacted automatically, listening to him immediately, even as she struggled to grasp what was happening, her mind slowly catching up as she felt him position himself behind her, a light hand caressing her bottom softly, tenderly.

"I'm sorry, I can't let you go yet Emma," he said, his voice full of unspoken emotions. And placing his hook and hand on either side of her hips, he gripped her tight, "I don't think you want me to." And saying nothing else he rocked his hips forward, parting her and sinking inside of her once again, the new angle causing her to cry out as he plunged into her deeply.

It was easier this way.

As he took her from behind, the pace much different from before—hard, frantic, and almost brutal—Emma gripped the sheets of the bed tightly, her hands clenching into fists as he drove into her again and again. Without the threat of meeting his ever-searching vibrant gaze, without seeing his face hovering over her, she found herself able to concentrate on sensations only—the feel of him hitting her in a spot that made her toes curl, the gentle touch of his hand alternating from her hip to her ass, his hook digging into her skin harshly.

This was just sex.

This was something she could handle.

"Touch yourself."

At his demand, she moaned, her breathing coming in and out in pants as he leaned over; his good hand sliding up her back and grasping her hair, as he drove even deeper into her.

"I want to see it Emma."

Unable to deny him, she blocked out every lingering emotion from before, and balancing herself on one hand she lifted her other and began rubbing herself slowly; the gentle friction of her fingers and the feel of him fucking her from behind causing pleasure to rise fast inside of her.

"Emma, Emma, Emma," he whispered her name, his thrusts fast and stinted as his breathing became harsher, his voice more gravelly. "I need you to come sweetheart, I need to feel it again."

"Yes." She moaned it; throwing her head back, she continued to dance her fingers over her sensitive nub, giving herself over entirely to the feelings that were building up in her. Slightly dazed, she focused on the way he felt inside of her, the sounds of his body slamming into her—skin slapping against skin, her stunted gasps of pleasure and his broken grunts of appreciation mixing together in thrilling and erotic notes.

_More. _

And just as she felt her climax begin to crest, the pressure inside of her nearly ready to burst, he reached around her. His good hand leaving the small of her back, he knocked hers out of the way and began rubbing her fiercely, his fingers rough and forceful. "So good, you feel so good. Gods your so tight, so wet…"

As he muttered filthy and delicious things while stroking her, his length continuing to slide in and out of her fast, she dug her nails into the bed and reared herself back. And unable to take it, unwilling to attempt to hold on any longer, she came hard—crying out an unfamiliar and beautiful name as she did.

_Pain._

_Pleasure._

_Salvation._

Gripping him tightly; her orgasm violent and intense, she struggled not to fall onto the bed, her arms and legs trembling as he grunted loudly, digging his fingers into her skin. With a soft curse, his hook nearly piercing her flesh, he stilled his movements for a moment, something hot pulsing inside of her, he leaned into her heavily, his body slick and hot against hers as he swore and panted harshly.

Finally, slowly, somewhat dazed and completely drained, she came down from her high, dimly aware of the fact that he was rocking against her lightly, still riding out the aftershocks of his own orgasm. And as she fought not to collapse, her arms shaking almost uncontrollably, she winced when he shifted behind her suddenly, withdrawing from her fast—her teeth finding her lower lip as she struggled not to whimper at the loss. And as he moved to lay down on the bed, huffing out a deep and satisfied breath, she turned over—her legs sore, her arms aching, she settled hesitantly onto the mattress and into a sitting position. She felt raw, sated, and energized. But even so, her brain was already shifting into panic mode; and her eyes quickly searched the floor for her clothes, noting each item and considering the quickest least awkward exit.

"You can go now, I won't stop you…but one of these days…_very soon_…you'll stay, and it'll be of your own accord. _You're choice_." he paused, and clearing his throat, let out a quiet self-deprecating chuckle. "Unfortunately love, right now, I don't think you're ready."

She shot her gaze to him, her eyes roaming over his figure idly as she took in the sight of him laying sprawled out on the bed. He appeared almost content; were it not for his tense features, the way his eyes refused to look at her and remained firmly on the ceiling above him.

"I—"

"After all you and I understand each other don't we darling?" When she said nothing, he smirked knowingly, his eyes closing briefly before opening again, blue and bright. "Look out for yourself and you'll never get hurt…right?"

She swallowed her blood running cold, as her words from what seemed like a lifetime ago were thrown back in her face.

_It's worked quite well for me._

_Yeah until the day that it doesn't._

"Hook."

"_That's _not my name." He told her, still keeping his eyes focused above. "You should know as much."

Furrowing her brow, she swallowed over the narrowness in her throat and unsure what to say to him, she shook her head; the need to thank him, to curse him, on the tip of her tongue as she got up and quickly gathered her clothes together. Slipping them on fast, her eyes fought to steer clear of his figure.

She couldn't face him just yet.

When she was dressed, her heart heavy with some terrifying emotion, her eyes blurring with the annoying presence of tears, she finally allowed herself to look down at him, surprised to see that his eyes were on her, watching her closely.

"I should go." she whispered, uncertain what else to say, if there was even anything else to say.

"Of course."

And turning to leave, she wanted to tell him that what had happened had changed nothing, that everything had to remain the same, but for reasons unknown to her, she couldn't bring herself to say it—the words getting stuck in her throat as she slowly walked towards the cabin door. Placing her hand on it, she closed her eyes, her heart clenching inside her chest as a voice whispered for her to _stay._

Looking back over her shoulder, she saw that he was sitting up, his vibrantly blue eyes still fixed on her, his expression disturbingly impassive. And meeting his gaze, seeing the turbulent emotions that most likely matched her own swirling there, she felt the corners of her lips unwittingly twitch upwards slowly as a name, both unfamiliar and beautiful flashed in her head.

_Relief._

_Gratefulness._

_Acceptance._

"Thank you Killian," she whispered softly.

And without another word she opened the door and left the room, walking out into the dark and cool corridor, the ship eerily silent—the sounds of the sea harshly lapping against it both soothing and frightening. Making her way to the crew's cabins, she tried to ignore the urge to go back to him, even while somewhat reluctantly embracing the undeniable change between them. Things would be different. And try as she might, she couldn't bring herself to regret it.

Sighing, coming to a stop in front of the door that led to her bed, _her solitude_, she paused, listening to the quiet sounds of her parents sleeping soundly on the other side. Drawing her lip into her mouth, her hand trembling as she made to push open the door, she took note of the frightening and odd feeling that was rushing through her veins, the heaviness that was once again weighing her down.

"No." she whispered as something inside of her clicked.

And shaking her head, a disbelieving and shaky smile pulling at her lips, Emma turned; and without allowing herself a chance to over think it, she made her way back to his cabin. Finding his room fast, she pushed the door open without hesitation, her eyes landing on him immediately, watching as he sat up in bed, still unashamedly naked.

Bending down she tugged her boots off again, and throwing them to the floor, she straightened somewhat ungracefully—her pulse racing, her mind reeling. "I don't want to talk about it tonight." she said, her voice hoarse, her lips quivering ever so slightly. "I _can't_ talk about it tonight...but..." she paused, and walking towards him, noticing how his eyes still had yet to leave her, unmasked hope swimming within them, she stopped at the edge of the bed. "But I don't want to leave either...I don't want to be alone."

He didn't say anything right away, instead he reached up and grabbed her hand; tugging on it lightly he pulled her onto the bed with him, his mouth lifting at the corners as she fell willingly—the small smile he gave her gentling his usually dark features. "Then you don't have to be lass."

Laying back down with him, she allowed him to tuck her into his side and hold her close, murmuring soft words into her hair, he rocked her gently, continuing to hold her even as the tears she'd been fighting to hold back for so long began to fall silently. And as she buried her head into his chest, letting herself indulge in the comforting feeling of his strong embrace, pushing aside but not forgetting her fear for Henry's safety, she slowly acknowledged the shifting of her feelings, the truth of her emotions as something else began to sink in and take hold of her gradually.

Later, panic would surely sink in, the fear and nerves inescapable. But tonight, in the aftermath of what had occurred between them, in the wake of their unspoken thoughts and undeniable feelings, tonight she would let him hold her.

And as her eyes closed, and she drifted, her exhaustion finally catching up to her, she dimly accepted that what was between them was so much more than mutual attraction and begrudging respect. From the desire, the want and the need, something strong and potent was beginning to take shape, something she had sworn she would never feel again, but suddenly felt helpless to deny.

As he ran his good hand down her back, over her hair lightly, whispering things to her in his deep and lilting voice, things that were soothing and terrifying and beautiful, she couldn't help but hope that perhaps with the light of the morning things wouldn't seem so cruel and bleak.

Maybe finally, in the midst of all the darkness, she had found something bright, burning_, _lasting...

_Love._

_*End*_

* * *

**No I'm not continuing it.**

**Sorry.**

**I just needed to write slightly angsty somewhat hopeful smut. **

**Hope you enjoyed!**

**Please review! :)**


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